Build your own adventure

[robinbloke]

You are standing outside a low stone building, there is a single door on this side that looks to be made of wood and metal. Behind you a trail winds back down the hill and away into the distance. It is approaching nightfall, the sun is tinging the sky and clouds pink with it's dying rays.
What do you do?

I will write you a "build your own adventure" style story if you leave a comment, just ask for a genre and give me a brief description of yourself and then say what you want to do, the rest will unfold...

Comments

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

"We're orks!" says one of them.
"No we're not" says another, who seems to be drawing some kind of shape on the ground, looks like noughts and crosses.
"Banzai!" shouts a third and prompty trips over a chair and falls in a heap.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

I use my special "obliterate monster in amusing manner" snacky I got from yesterday's Alex adventure on the one playing noughts and crosses, as he's obviously the clever one, then rummage in my bag for a pack of twiglets to tempt the clumsy one.

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

The GM hangs his head in his hands as you blow a 6000 shilling snacky to kill a 5 hit orc. Welcome to the talky encounter.
The clumsy one perks up at the sight of food and shambles over in a bad impression of gollum, the second one starts trying to nick your swords, it's not Graham, oh no.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

I fumble momentarily in my pocket and then make a strange gesture with my other hand over the top of the twiglets before handing them to the clumsy one and telling the ref that I just put an IP 20 on them.

Then I get into an argument with the other one about whether or not I can use my dodge to stop him grabbing my sword from where it's stuffed through my belt.

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

The clumsy one falls over dead just as the other one starts running off with a sword that possibly belongs to you, although you don't recall ever seeing it before...

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

I quickly check that the other ten swords I am carrying (phys-repped by the two stuffed through my belt) are still there then begin a "Benny Hill" like chase around the grounds after the other monster. He wouldn't be running unless he was worth catching!

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

NotGraham runs like mad, shouting "You'll never take me alive." he apparently has speed, haste and foot of the goob.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

I carry on chasing him, losing ground, but knowing I should be able to corner him near the barbed wire fence at the edge of the site, but slip on a discarded crisp packet, losing sight of the monster. I cast a 60' blink spell and yell, "Time Stop" loudly at him a few times in vain as I continue my chase.

#;)

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

He apparently has used monster wibble power #473 to vanish out of costume (he took off his hat) and escape and you run right into a group of elementals (so they tell you)
Welcome back to the elemental adventures!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

I have a huge strop, as the ref said the adventure was about orcs and trolls and stuff and didn't say there were going to be elementals and if I'd known there were going to be elementals, I would have played my Elementalist/Guardian, not the Warlock character I am playing, who is useless against elemental stuff.

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

The ref tells you it's too late, however one of the elementals sidles up while one of the players is asking his stats again and offers to make you a deal if you'll help him kick in a troll thats been bugging them; they being water eles they're having some trouble, and they'll swing you some free beer.
The ref finishes briefing the other monster and then shouts at John for turning the encounter into a 'talkie'.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

LMAO - I'll let the elementals know that I have something for them, then nod to the other players and rummage through my back pack, pulling out .... my familiar!

I then call a brief timestop whilst I explain that my character will be hiding the party safely, flying, invisible 30' up in the air, so we shall all be playing our familiars ourselves for the duration of the encounter....

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

The GM groans as a whole new load of battleboards have to be done, this takes forever and someone slopes off to the garage for some grub in the meantime meaning that when you're actually finished you have to wait anyway as there are no monsters there.
Words like 'flutch' and 'annoying bastards' seem to be muttered around the monster briefing corner along with 'death carrot'.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

I and the other players all put on stupid (er) voices to play the familiars and engage the monsters in combat, using all sorts of wierd abilities and snackies, explaining anything wierd with the mantra, "It's okay - it's from an Alex/Alisdair adventure."

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

The monsters respond with just as cheesy powers and you realise you have fallen prey to the silly adventure, all the monsters are hitting "location to cheese" and are only effected by fire or cracker based damage.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stormknight_/]

Luckily, one of the ten swords I had on me *ahem* was the sword of Sir Jacob, from a similar adventure a year ago, so that deals with killing the monsters.

To deal with the cheesed limbs? Well, it's started raining loads anyway, so after the encounter I suggest to the ref that it's probably enough for one day and we could always continue tomorrow. Besides, if we head back now, we can order pizza and play tabletop ....

[robinbloke.livejournal.com]

At this point John suggests playing Amber and everyone is distracted by beating him up, instead T&T is suggested and everyone starts to work out if they have enough dice to actually play, or even if enough dice exist on the planet to play.