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Jul. 28th, 2004
(no subject)
Jul. 28th, 2004 11:30 amYou're in a field, the wind blowing the corn so it flows like waves of the sea around you. Above you marshmallow clouds slowly chase each other across the pale blue sky. The warm light of the sun makes the hairs on the back of your neck tingle, a shadow cast in front of you on the ocean of stalks.
At the end of the field a row of trees in technicolor green form a wall against the waves of the field are rolling, while they themselves too slowly wave and rock in the wind.
Someone told me something once, it was about how the world relates to you and how it sees you. How the eye of the universe turns in on itself for a moment to reflect on the thing inside it that is looking out, wondering the same thing that it is.
I wrote a poem about how a star might see the universe, or more specifically how a singularity - a so called infinity surrounded other objects, which means it cannot be as so.
Or was it a contextual infinity? Within the bubble of it's own influence, the sphere of its own timeframe that it perceives what it is and looks out... seeing nothing beyond the edge of its existance as it sucks more and more into itself in order to understand what it is, changing its own nature by the very act of doing so.
Then the eye closed and it all fell apart, bricks and mortar scattered to the winds, then shards, then dust, then nothingness.
Under that lie the question it was asking in the first place, at least to its current thoughts, the question didn't know what it was looking for either, but it was there nevertheless. With no answer or direction for it to seek it just was an idea of a query rather than a question itself.
It couldn't ask what it wanted to, because it didn't know what it needed to ask, or understand what the thought was trying to direct it to. Meaningless circles curled around it in ever decreasing spirals of introspection until the infinity was reborn again.
And the trees waved on at the edge of the field. Silently mocking those who stood and watched.
At the end of the field a row of trees in technicolor green form a wall against the waves of the field are rolling, while they themselves too slowly wave and rock in the wind.
Someone told me something once, it was about how the world relates to you and how it sees you. How the eye of the universe turns in on itself for a moment to reflect on the thing inside it that is looking out, wondering the same thing that it is.
I wrote a poem about how a star might see the universe, or more specifically how a singularity - a so called infinity surrounded other objects, which means it cannot be as so.
Or was it a contextual infinity? Within the bubble of it's own influence, the sphere of its own timeframe that it perceives what it is and looks out... seeing nothing beyond the edge of its existance as it sucks more and more into itself in order to understand what it is, changing its own nature by the very act of doing so.
Then the eye closed and it all fell apart, bricks and mortar scattered to the winds, then shards, then dust, then nothingness.
Under that lie the question it was asking in the first place, at least to its current thoughts, the question didn't know what it was looking for either, but it was there nevertheless. With no answer or direction for it to seek it just was an idea of a query rather than a question itself.
It couldn't ask what it wanted to, because it didn't know what it needed to ask, or understand what the thought was trying to direct it to. Meaningless circles curled around it in ever decreasing spirals of introspection until the infinity was reborn again.
And the trees waved on at the edge of the field. Silently mocking those who stood and watched.
(no subject)
Jul. 28th, 2004 11:40 amI need a way to describe or post feelings.
If Livejournal is a progression, or at least it is for me, I need a way beyond text to formulate a feeling and leave it here for the ages, so I can come back and taste it once again.
This whole blogging thing has been a slow evolution of communication for me; each a step up beyond the previous, a larger footprint or "better" way to let loose my mind upon the world and sell tickets for front row seats at the same time.
There was paper, there was mailing lists and then there was a blog.
Not a particularly huge stage of evolution, but each one has been a greater outlet for my mind.
Thats it, the mind. I need a way to map thoughts to chemcials and recall them, reinject the mish mash of whatever is churning in my brain at point X and then recall it so I can taste it once again, metaphorically speaking, and use it to remap the words and thoughts that accompany it.
Maybe someday, maybe never.
But I can try with these words...
I'm disjointed, currently I feel like I'm a second person inside the shell of the first, my skin is... almost tingling slightly and my mind feels almost like I have a mild headache, but it's not unpleasant - it's more relaxing, comforting. My eyes have a slightly sluggish feel to them and I almost feel like I'm floating. Everything has a slow, careful feel about it and the world around me is very sharp, very clear; my mind is an open door at the moment - I can focus on a thing and concents and details leap into sharp attention, a curl of a leaf becomes a mirad of detail and lines and tangental possibilities.
That is my current mood at least, it's usually most inspired by music. I can be very creative in this mood, but it's also very good for making brain dumps and suchlike.
And no, I have eaten no sugar, drank no coffee nor taken any narcotics of any description - if you are wondering. This was purely brought on by a half thought which led to me putting on some music which carried me away to where I am now - emotionally speaking at least.
If Livejournal is a progression, or at least it is for me, I need a way beyond text to formulate a feeling and leave it here for the ages, so I can come back and taste it once again.
This whole blogging thing has been a slow evolution of communication for me; each a step up beyond the previous, a larger footprint or "better" way to let loose my mind upon the world and sell tickets for front row seats at the same time.
There was paper, there was mailing lists and then there was a blog.
Not a particularly huge stage of evolution, but each one has been a greater outlet for my mind.
Thats it, the mind. I need a way to map thoughts to chemcials and recall them, reinject the mish mash of whatever is churning in my brain at point X and then recall it so I can taste it once again, metaphorically speaking, and use it to remap the words and thoughts that accompany it.
Maybe someday, maybe never.
But I can try with these words...
I'm disjointed, currently I feel like I'm a second person inside the shell of the first, my skin is... almost tingling slightly and my mind feels almost like I have a mild headache, but it's not unpleasant - it's more relaxing, comforting. My eyes have a slightly sluggish feel to them and I almost feel like I'm floating. Everything has a slow, careful feel about it and the world around me is very sharp, very clear; my mind is an open door at the moment - I can focus on a thing and concents and details leap into sharp attention, a curl of a leaf becomes a mirad of detail and lines and tangental possibilities.
That is my current mood at least, it's usually most inspired by music. I can be very creative in this mood, but it's also very good for making brain dumps and suchlike.
And no, I have eaten no sugar, drank no coffee nor taken any narcotics of any description - if you are wondering. This was purely brought on by a half thought which led to me putting on some music which carried me away to where I am now - emotionally speaking at least.
Meme suggestion?
Jul. 28th, 2004 01:58 pmDescribe your 'current mood', rather than keeping it to a single word - expand on it as much as you can. How it alters your perceptions, changes what you think, makes you feel.
Heres mine again for 'Disjointed'
Currently I feel like I'm a second person inside the shell of the first, my skin is... almost tingling slightly and my mind feels almost like I have a mild headache, but it's not unpleasant - it's more relaxing, comforting. My eyes have a slightly sluggish feel to them and I almost feel like I'm floating. Everything has a slow, careful feel about it and the world around me is very sharp, very clear; my mind is an open door at the moment - I can focus on a thing and concents and details leap into sharp attention, a curl of a leaf becomes a mirad of detail and lines and tangental possibilities.
And put the mood as 'See above'
Heres mine again for 'Disjointed'
Currently I feel like I'm a second person inside the shell of the first, my skin is... almost tingling slightly and my mind feels almost like I have a mild headache, but it's not unpleasant - it's more relaxing, comforting. My eyes have a slightly sluggish feel to them and I almost feel like I'm floating. Everything has a slow, careful feel about it and the world around me is very sharp, very clear; my mind is an open door at the moment - I can focus on a thing and concents and details leap into sharp attention, a curl of a leaf becomes a mirad of detail and lines and tangental possibilities.
And put the mood as 'See above'