As quoted by me to a friend...

[robinbloke]

The standard rule of relationships is as follows :-

You only ever find anyone you like attracted to you when you are already in a relationship.
These chances are doubled if it is a committed relationship and tripled if you are married.

Comments

[zotz]

It's like the difficulty finding a job if you don't have one. Obviously there must be something wrong with you if you're actually available.

Hm,

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

it's usually the reverse for me.
People I'm attracted seem to be in a relationship already.
Story of my life. *sigh*

[surje.livejournal.com]

I think it's a causal thing both ways. Being in a relationship makes you more desirable due to unavailability, and fancying someone who is in a relationship is easier as it's easy to pretend it's a fantasy rather than a serious plan.

Not being in a relationship seems to mean (to a cynical observer, possibly subconsciously) that either you are not capable of being in a relationship, or you were in a bad relationship; which means that either the badness was your fault, or you are now hypersensitive from the pain the badness caused you.

and...

[k-lioness.livejournal.com]

Not to mention the fact that people who are in relationships are generally more confident and secure in themselves as people, which makes them more attractive to others and more open to the opportunities. People who are not in relationships (for whatever reason) tend to be less sure of themselves when meeting new people.
If you are in a relationship and the new person doesn't like you, who cares, you're in a relationship... there's no pressure. If you're single, you're more likely to feel pressure to like you, making you less likable.

[davywavy.livejournal.com]

Observations on this:

1) If you're male and in a relationship, it demonstrates to the world that you're reliable and willing to make a commitment. These are attractive qualities in a chap.
2) Find attached people attractive is also a defense mechanism; if you fail to get them, then it isn't your fault, as they attached. If you succeed, then you're obviously great. it's safe.
3) Never have a relationship with a person who broke theirs for you. if they did it to the last guy, they'll do it to you.
4) if you do succeed with an attached person, for Gods sake keep it quiet.