robinbloke | Wanted: Infinity minus one monkeys, apply below.

"'Cause you gotta have goals'"
Denis Leary

Who remarkably seems to have turned himself into a frontline actor fighting the cause, the man and cherry hula hoops or erm, something.
Goals however, not in the footy sense, is an interesting thing. When you get where you're going you still need something to aim for - what keeps the likes of Bill Gates busy when he has the software world at his feet, metaphorically speaking. If you conquered the world what would you do next? Hmmm...

[Poll #428198]

Anyway, my brain somehow got to this train of thought several tracks sideways over a fishpond and onto a small mountain trail heading South to the line of thought that was previously my infinite monkeys train of though with a dash of hitch hikers guide.

So, if as in the end of the third book of the trilogy of five, I use a randomisation method to select letters then what exactly do I generate? I don't have any scrabble pieces to hand (and all I ever seem to spell with them is QUIXZGGM, good word score but try and convince the other person it's real).
The solution is obvious, my keyboard, so representing as I do approximately 10^-infinityth of an ape the amount of text I generate is, statistically, not even important; since the amount of ape-age I represent is so vanishingly teeny tiny if I type 100, 1000 or even a billion random characters the effect is, with regards to infinity, much the same.

Thus begins the flimsy justification for this largely pointless experiment...

hfwhlaliowiumyfjmrbv[mvfrbvgde;os.;dfv.as.dsaluynfrvsyujhrip;wqipujk,nfzdkkzjbvwepaoihfu
bnrveuygvopmkjsaplqfkvnsohg98aruomfvtiguhweniowucamenxdoiuemfbaoeasu,owabyzexg

Fantastic.

Now begins the interpretation.
"How?" may you ask, does one interpret such a shoddy lump of meaningless gibberish.
The answer is obvious, something that is used to handling meaningless gibberish, a Microsoft product.
In this case Microsoft word.⁰ Using flux denotated¹ randomisation I will add some spaces and then use words spell checker to see what the hell it produces. This will then be the answer to life, the universe and everything from my point of view.

Holding your breath? you probably shouldn't be, breathing is important you know.

With spaces my text becomes...

hfw hl ali owiu my jmrb [m vf rbvgde;os.;dfv.as .ds alu ynfrvs yujhri p;wqip ujk,nf zdk
kzjbv we paoih fu nrve uygv opm kj s aplqfkvns ohg9 8aruomf vti guhw eniow uc amen xdo
iue mfbaoe asu,ow abyzexg

Later experiments could include submit this to a foreign language translator for important further research².

Behold:

hew hl ail owe my jamb [m if rbvgde;os.;dfv.as .ads alum infers euchre p;wqip ujk,nf zed
kzjbv we poach fu nerve urge ohm kHz s aplqfkvns ohg9 8aruomf vita gush endow us amen do
ice fable assuror baize

Now, removing any words that aren't, well, words as 'typos'³ we get... (hold your breath)

hew hl ail owe my jamb if alum infers euchre zed
we poach fu nerve urge ohm kHz s vita gush endow us amen do
ice fable assuror baize

Catchy huh? This mess suggests many reasons for the state of my brain. Suggestions for the exact interpretation of this welcome.

Now make your own - don't forget the double sided sticky tape!

0⁴ Although mobile phone predictive text is an obvious other choice.
1 This is a star-trek ism. I'm inserting them randomly.
2 Also known as 'having a laff'.
3 Or just culling them like the dogs they are, take your pick.
4 Yes zero, I backtracked.